Pakistan is a country where ‘arranged marriage’ is no alien word. Even though the trend is pretty much changing and the new generation prefers ‘love’ marriage, the concept of your parents selecting your life partner hasn’t completely gone.
However, in a trendier setting, you get to meet and approve your spouse unlike your grandmother’s era when she only saw her husband on the wedding night.
Arranged marriage may sound old school but it comes with a bunch of pros that not even your most liberal friend can deny.
First off, you get a safe and secure environment where there’s no fear of getting in trouble and being lied to by someone like on a dating site. There are no hidden names, fake IDs and profile pictures involved. Looking for your ‘the one’ is a great job, having your parents at work takes a lot of stress and anxiety out of your life.
NO NEED FOR APPROVAL
In a Pakistani set up, if you succeed finding your soul mate, the next step is getting your parents’ approval and more importantly getting your in-laws’ approval. In an arranged marriage, your spouse is already been approved by your parents and the chances are they have chosen someone keeping in mind your personality and lifestyle. The same goes for your in laws; they have done their research before they reached out to your family for your hand.
EVERYTHING IS TAKEN CARE OF
Conventional parents meticulously search for a spouse for their children. They take care that whoever they choose is mentally compatible with you, their religious and moral values match with yours. If you are a male, then you parents look for a daughter-in-law they think can adjust in your family and can understand your family values. Similarly a female’s parents look for a family who can provide their daughter with a loving family where she can start her new life.
IT KEEPS YOU CLOSER TO YOUR ROOTS
Marrying someone from the same religion and culture keeps you closer to your roots. You are likely to find lots of similarities between you and your partner which means lesser chances of difference of opinion that can lead to arguments and fights in the future.
YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE ALONE
In an arranged marriage, you are not alone responsible of your future. Your parents make sure they are there for you and have your back in case your marriage faces any downfalls; after all they were the ones who chose your partner for you. It does, however, bring some pressure on you, for as a good offspring you would not want you let down your parents and for that you tend to give your marriage more chances than you would otherwise.
YOU TRY TO WORK IT OUT
A lot of your time as newly wedded couple maybe taken in knowing and understanding each other better. Since you know separation or divorce is your last resort, you try your best to make it work. while both the bride and the bridegroom are putting in efforts to know each other better and spend more time together they are more likely to fall in love than not. They might not have said their “qubool hai” completely love struck, but the chances of their love blooming are fairly high.
CHILDREN GROW IN CONFLICT-FREE ENVIRONMENT
With both parents belonging to the same religion and cultural values, your children will grow up in a conflict free environment where they do not have to choose between two religions. Therefore, you do not have to worry about opposing views on things, as they were discussed ahead of time and are less likely to affect your children’s upbringing.
The best part about modern arranged marriages is that your parents are not as strict as your fore fathers and you do get a chance to judge your parents selection on basis of your own understanding.